Being a full time single mom is challenging.

Being a full time working mom is challenging.

I’m struggling with balancing being my kids mom and doing what’s best for them with my feelings about my job and working.

I have 1 kid with definite Covid symptoms…I have 1 kid with no symptoms…

I have 2 kids home from school today…

Both kids have been tested.

We’re waiting for the results.

I hate waiting.

I’m trying to do the right thing and keep my kids away from other people so we don’t spread this stupid virus around…I’m so tired of this virus.

I’m frustrated because I am a hard worker and I hate having to miss and I know that my absence makes things at work all the more challenging and frustrating for my boss and coworkers.

But if I choose work over my kids I’m not being a responsible parent..and if I choose my kids over my work then I’m being a bad worker…and it’s a wagon wheel of guilt and blame and shifting and struggle…

BUT…

I will stay home and keep my kids away from others

I will work on things for work as much as I am able from a safe distance to protect my students

I will do what needs to be done and try to silence the unseen judgement and critics who I think are watching me..